Straight from the Squeeze Chute …. North-Side Nocona ..
Cattle Baron , Zeke Bowles , suffered a tremendous impact while surveying his herd earlier this week .. the youngest and most agile of his vast herd of Brangus Momma Cows was scheduled to give birth.. She was heavy Springing , as the Professional Cow Punchers say ..
In keeping with what his Ranch Mentor , Jim Kennedy , once told him… “Keep a close eye on those First Calf Heifers ..they are prone to have problems…”
Turns out the heifer had already mastered all the skills needed to deliver and DEFEND her new-born baby ..
Apathetic to her new role as “Momma Cow” , Zeke approached her in his usual manner… feed bucket in hand.. surveying the perimeter for any signs of the new born baby ..He brought a bucket of feed to a foot race !
He turned his attention promptly back to the cow …just in time to observe the lowering of her head , and projectile snot blowing intensely from both nostrils…She challenged him to a retreat back to his truck ..
Zeke being the fit example of agility often seen only at the NFR , she nailed him twice before he could escape bodily harm….all without any help from a Rodeo Clown..
Fist encounter with his lower backside elevated him to new heights , and gave little time for an alternate method of escape.. crawl under his truck…or.. make a second dash for safety inside the cab..?
Inadvertently , momma cow made that split-second decision for him… she blasted him a second courtesy shot….. pinning Zeke to the grille of his trusty Dodge ranch truck ..as snot and other yet unidentified liquids drooled down his back….
he’s now in his third day of recovery in his recliner.. very gingerly eating candy coated peanuts and recounting his near-death experience with the first-calf heifer … Merry Christmas from Texas Monthly…